Bloody battles fought in vain.
Said for glory, but it's a lie for shame.
Men they die, hit the ground.
With an awful cry or a muffled sound.
Gory grounds drenched with life.
Not what those highplaced men contrived.
But it is not they who fight the war.
It's the working man who settles the score.
As the poor man loses life and limb
Mankinds future was never so dim.
For honour, for glory, for freedom they call.
In final though, death captures all.
How years are wasted in the sand and mud
The flower of life is too soon cut.
Overall, I like it. I like the general theme and message and the way it's conveyed. I do think it needs a bit more of a flow.
This reminds me of a poem I read once... Have you ever read 'Flanders Fields' by I don't know who?
Yes, I did read Flanders Fields. I just looked it up, couldn't quite remember it. It's by McCrae, if you wish to know. It is one of the many beautiful poems written in reaction to World War One. We studied them in English class, it was very interesting, to learn the backgrounds and everything. Very compelling too.
McCrae... I'll remember that. I only know of it because it's one one of a bunch of posters in my English classroom about elements of poetry... They each give an element, its definition, then a famous poem with a good example of the element. Flanders Fields was for alliteration, I think.
-I'm guessing that 'years are wasted' is referring to war?
-Yush. I noticed the alliteration.
-It's not too dramatic. To me anyway. I just like things like that.
-Not that I can see, unless I missed them too.
-The title's not really... speaking to me. I don't really know how else to explain it.
- In my intention it mainly referred to the years that the soldiers could still have lived, but more option are possible, of which yours is one of course
- And? Do you like it?
- Okay
- Super
- Yeah, I suck at titles xD I'll think about it.